The Kingdom of Red Azaleas
by Carolina DiMare
Summary: I dipped my feet into the sea that I had always seen, but never truly experienced. Funny that it had been at my doorstep since I was young, but I had never felt it as fully as I did now. The cold, winter water surrounded my tanned ankles, making me sink into the rich shoreline. I felt arms wrap around my waist, his arms. "Clarisse, we need to go, now," He said.
1. Prologue

**Hello everybody, I have completely re-written this to make it entirely in Clarisse's view! Old readers, I hope you still like it, and new readers- enjoy! please leave reviews!**

**Prologue**

I watched my father wave his wand made of dragon heartstring to produce a beautiful field of red azaleas on the Mediterranean Sea. He looked down at me, a huge smile across his wrinkled face.

"It's really all for me?" I asked, memorized by the beautiful magic that my father was able to produce.

"I promised you a kingdom," said my father. "and I don't break promises, my darling."

"But, It's not a kingdom," I responded. "It's a field of pretty flowers."

"But it is a kingdom, Clary," said father. "You don't need a castle, or guards, or princes, or knights in shining armor for it to be a kingdom; you'll get that someday, I promise," father winked at me. "But today you have a field of azaleas on the Mediterranean sea. And you are the princess of this kingdom."

Father waved his wand once again, fashioning me my very own crown spun from the freshest, most beautiful flowers in the field.

"It doesn't take all too much to be a princess, you see. All you need is a crown," father motioned to the azalea headdress that I wore, "and a king," said father.

"But I don't have a king!" I cried. "I can't possibly be a princess!"

"But you are _my_ princess, Clarisse. And I am the king of your red azalea kingdom," said father. I grinned. "Now go explore your kingdom! What kind of princess doesn't know all of the wonders that her kingdom has to offer?"

I couldn't think of any in that moment of youth and happiness, so I eagerly ran through the kingdom of azaleas, twirling my pale blue dress around my bony hips. I fell onto my knees and lay on the beautiful, petal covered field floor. My field; my kingdom. I spread the fallen petals across my tiny body like blood. A horrible, beautiful blood. I would live and die in this kingdom of red azaleas. The kingdom that was created for me.


	2. 1 Finding Mayla

"A young woman lay on a cold concrete floor. The room was almost entirely dark, with the exception of a sliver of light shining through a heavy, oak door…"

"But, did you see who the woman was? was it-"

"Clarisse, I already told you, I can't be sure. She looked to have curly black hair. She was wearing a knee length dress. There looked to be blood on her left arm-"

"It's her." I stated. Harry lifted his eyebrow.

"But Clarisse, we just can't be sure, the dark lord could be fooling me. He knows that I have these visions, he could be trying to bring me to that basement-"

"I guess we can't be sure until we see it for ourselves," I said. Harry sighed. "Harry, I care about my sister more than anybody in this entire world. I need to go there and find out if it's her. I know that Mayla is like a big sister to you too. we need to save her."

"You're right," said Harry. "But, what if it is a hoax? We could all end up dead."

"Oh, and you haven't gotten us in millions of situation in which we could have been killed?"

Harry smirked, "okay, Clary, you kind of have a point."

"So, umm, now to figure out where your dream took place," I said.

"Yeah, that's a bit important," said Harry. "Let's get back in the tent. Ron can keep watch, Hermione will probably have some kind of idea."

I got up off of the snowy ground and followed Harry into the tent. Ron went outside to keep watch, and Harry retold his dream to Hermione.

Somewhere in the retelling of the story, I once again got lost in my daydreaming and thought about exactly how I ended up here, somewhere in England, hunting horcruxes with Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

* * *

It was the day of Bill and Fleur's wedding. The day began magnificently. I woke up early to prepare myself and then Fleur. I pulled on my short, lavender bridesmaid gown and tied my black curls into a messy ballerina bun, a skill that I had mastered from early school mornings at Hogwarts. I strapped on a pair of fierce black pumps and then helped Hermione, Ginny, Mayla, and Mrs. Weasley get Fleur prepared. I remember yelling at Mayla, who had showed up still in pajamas. I knew that she would never be ready in time, considering the large amount of time she spent preparing in the morning. She reassured me that she would be fine, even though she actually did end up running down the aisle a full minute after the rest of the bridesmaids.

The ceremony was stunning aside from Mayla's special entrance, the reception was when trouble arrived. we received a message stating that the minister of magic was dead, and the reception erupted into chaos. The last thing I remember about the ceremony was nearly being trampled by a crowd of people until Harry grabbed me and pulled me to Hermione and Ron. We apparated to a diner somewhere in London, were nearly killed a few times along the way, and now here we are. Somewhere in the British wilderness planning a mission to save my older sister, Mayla.

"Clarisse- CLARISSE!" Said Harry. I jumped. Had I dozed off?

"Yeah?" I said.

"Were you even listening to any of that?" asked Harry.

"Nope," I said. Harry glared at me. "I've already heard the story. I just want to know where Mayla is and how we can save her."

Harry rolled his eyes. "What exactly do you think we've been doing for the past ten minutes Clary? while you were off in your own mind we were trying to form a plan to save _your_ sister."

"Sorry, mom," I said jokingly. Harry glared at me. "Oh come on, I was joking. calm down."

"_What_," said Harry. "Is this all a joke to you Clarisse? We are at _war_. Do you not realize that? This isn't a silly muggle board game, this is real life!"

"How can I _not_ _realize_ that after all that we've been through in the past few months? I'm terrified. I wake up every day thinking that it may be my last. Just let me cope with this living hell my own way!"

"Shut up!" yelled Hermione. "I can't take you two constantly fighting! Harry, Clarisse is the closest thing to a sister that you'll ever have, and I know that Harry is family to you, Clary. So stop fighting like five year old twins and make up! I'm taking watch. Maybe Ron can decipher where exactly Mayla is. RON!"

Ron sprinted through the door. "What's wrong, is everybody okay?"

"Yes, we're fine. It's your turn to try to figure out where Mayla is. good luck," said Hermione as she marched through the door.

"What's her problem?" asked Ron.

"Don't worry about it," I said. We sat in silence for a minute. I sighed. "We're all obviously very stressed, and it's almost two in the morning. Let's get some sleep and then try to figure this out."

Harry nodded. "I'll let Hermione know, good night."


	3. 2 Good and Evil

Where had the time gone? I thought to myself as I lay awake in my cot. It felt like just yesterday I had left my tearful muggle mother standing outside platform nine and three quarters for the first time as I followed Mayla and her friends through the brick barricade. And now, at the age of seventeen I was fighting a war. I could not believe how my life had changed in such a short amount of time. My innocence had disappeared and was replaced by a stone hard part of me that I had never asked for, yet accepted. Friends had died before my eyes, and people that I loved were risking their lives to save the world.

My mind wandered to Mayla. Where could she possibly be? I was horribly afraid for her. She was the strongest person that I knew, but not even she could withstand the torture that I imagined being afflicted on her where she was. They would torture the story out of her, but she would never tell. In that situation, I knew, she would forget about herself and protect the Order and Dumbledore's Army.

* * *

Mayla had been a spy for the Order as soon as she graduated from Hogwarts. It was easy for her to have an in with the death eaters. Our uncle, Gionni Parola was a very dark wizard who was still a death eater, although he had spent a few years in Azkaban. Our father David Parola-his brother- had died of a heart attack when I was only seven years old. such a silly thing for a wizard to die of, I thought. It was instant, in the middle of the night. I heard my mother scream so I ran into their room to see what was the matter. My sister had fallen asleep on the patio, as she did sometimes, so she didn't hear the scream. I opened the door and saw my mother cradling my father, sobbing and rocking his lifeless body. I ran to get Mayla, who at the age of nine was able to calmly call an ambulance. I sat on my mothers bed sobbing along with her until the ambulance got to our home and took my father away in a big, plastic bag. The doctor said that he was dead instantly, that he hadn't felt a thing. It didn't matter how he died to me, what mattered was that he was gone forever. I would have to live with the fact that my last words to him had been _buonanotte, vechio_ or,'goodnight, old man'. But he would never grow old. He would eternally be twenty-eight. After a year of my father's death, my mother decided to go back to her maiden name, Fontana. She couldn't handle the fact that she had the dead love of her life's name attached to her own.

I knew that my father was a death eater, but he hadn't been bad. He had loved my mother and me so much. He had loved Mayla. My mother's giant, Italian, muggle family had accepted him and vice versa. I knew that there were other death eaters at his funeral, although I didn't know what the phrase meant yet, or what kind of immense power it would hold someday. The death eaters mourned my father just like the rest of us. How could they be bad? The bigger question is how does a seven year old grasp the concept that some people _are_ bad?

The funeral was the first time that I met Draco Malfoy. Our fathers had been friends, so my mother seemed to expect that we would befriend each other, and we did. There was a park outside of the funeral home, so after the service we played on the swing sets, showing off to each other our strange ability to make the swing stop mid air or make the mulch dance around.

We told each other about our schooling experiences. He was taught at a children's wizarding school from the age of five years old. I was homeschooled by my parents. He learned grammar, basic maths, reading, history of magic, and basic European history. My schooling was far more in depth. on top of what Draco was being taught, I had to learn how to speak, read and write both English and French (a task that I had nearly mastered by now, although Draco said that I spoke English with a funny accent, which I still do), my mother also made sure that I knew Italian grammar. She said that knowing more than one language was incredibly important. I learned numerous histories (American, Italian, European, French, Asian, wizarding, and even Tuscan), geography (by the age of six I could name every country in Eurasia as well as their capitals), muggle sciences, and French, English, and Italian literature. Draco seemed stunned that I could possibly know so much.

I told him about growing up in Tuscany, he told me all about the wizard world in England. I was mesmerized by the stories he told. How people played sports on flying broomsticks, could transport themselves to any place they pleased, and how people could cast spells using a magical wand. I complained about how un-magical my world was after my father's death, but he told me not to worry, because we would both be going to a magical school in a few years. We agreed to be friends at school, but things changed. We went to different houses, I befriended his rivals, and we didn't talk again until the middle of our sixth year, after I saved his life.

* * *

Mayla was a death eater, but she wasn't at the same time. She was a spy for the Order, she was good, she wanted to end the life of the dark lord like the rest of us. She had the dark mark, and the dark lord trusted her. This meant that wherever she was, she was in grave danger. The dark lord would be incredibly mad at her for being a spy, and she would die. Did the dark lord know about Draco too? How Draco had been telling me the death eater's whereabouts for almost a year. Draco, who I had loved deeply since my sixth year.


	4. 3 The Boy I Saved

Draco and I had first met at a young age back then we didn't understand that some people were good, and some were evil. We didn't know that we both came from very dark wizarding families. We loved our families, and they loved us. Back then, we didn't understand the prejudice over blood status, or even ethnicity, or that purebloods were considered the superiors to half bloods, like myself. We didn't understand family legacy, that we were both destined to be in Slytherin like our parents had been in years prior. My sister went into slytherin, as expected, while I on the other hand shocked my entire wizarding family by going into gryffindor. I didn't know at the time that Harry, one of my best friends was destined to be the wizard to defeat the Dark Lord, or that I would be aiding in the crusade against the death eaters. I didn't know that I would save someone's life. At seven years old I never thought that I would ever be put in the situation in which I would have to. Ignorance truly is bliss. I long to be young and ignorant again. To live the rest of my life as a six year old in my kingdom of azaleas. Back when prejudice didn't exist in my tiny world; back when my father was alive; back when there was no war that needed my participation. But this was reality. I am seventeen years old, my father has been dead for ten years, Voldemort is back, I am are somewhere in the English wilderness in search of pieces of the dark lords soul, and one year ago during the holidays of my sixth year I had been reunited with a childhood friend in the worst possible of ways...

* * *

The eventful night began great. I was attending Professor Slughorn's annual Christmas party with Harry, one of my best friends. I made small talk with a few people, talking about silly things that truly didn't matter in the course of events. It felt great to let my mind go free for a bit. Gossiping and talking about the daily news really were fantastic ways to clear your mind. Not the bad parts of the news, the light, airy news like celebrity weddings, recent award shows, singers that had had babies, etc.

Suddenly, Mr. Filch plowed his way through the crowd towing Draco Malfoy by the collar of his shirt. My mind wandered back to my father's funeral. How we were actually friends back then. We hadn't said a word to each other since. People really do change, I thought to myself.

"Let go of me you filthy little squib! I'm a prefect!" cried Draco as he struggled out of Filch's grasp. By then the entire party had gone silent. All eyes were on Draco. We made eye contact for a split second, but I broke the momentary glance by looking down at the fire whiskey in my hand. I hadn't actually drank any of it. I usually don't drink. I accepted it when Harry offered it to me simply to be nice.

"I found this wandering the corridors, professor Slughorn" said Filch. "Said he was attending your party."

Slughorn hesitated for a moment. "errm… yes. yes he is," said Slughorn. I always found my professor to be far too nice. He could have sent Draco to weeks of detention, but instead he accepted him as another member of the slug club. Slughorn placed his hand on Draco's shoulder. Draco's body seemed to tense up, but his hard expression softened. He actually looked confused. "I was wondering where you had wound up, Mr. Malfoy!" Said Slughorn with his usual goofy smile. "You must be on your way, Mr. Filch. Unless you'd like to join the party!"

Filch gave Slughorn a disgusted look. "I'll be going, professor."

"Have a pleasant night!" called Slughorn as Filch exited the room.

By then some people had started talking again and the music had resumed. Harry and I were still absorbed in the Malfoy business. Slughorn pulled Draco into a corner. Harry and I had mastered the technique of eavesdropping by then, so we stood close by, trying to hear the conversation.

"Now, Mr. Malfoy" said Slughorn "I'm sure you know that students should not be wandering the hallways at night. It is strictly forbidden for the protection of you, and the school. As a prefect I would expect you to know the rules, am I correct?"

"Yes, professor." murmured Draco.

"So, may I ask why you were wandering the corridors at this hour?"

"I...I was headed to professor Snape's classroom. I had a question for him regarding…umm… tomorrow's homework assignment." stammered Draco.

"Very well then" Said Slughorn "Now, why did you lie to Mr. Filch?"

"ummm, Filch doesn't particularly like Snape, I thought that he would send me to detention if I told him I was going to ask Professor Snape a question" Said Draco.

I could tell by the expression on Slughorn's face that he didn't quite believe Draco.

"Then be on your way, Mr. Malfoy," said Slughorn. "It must be an important question if it made you leave your house at this hour."

"Thank you, sir," said Draco as he walked out of the room.

Harry excused himself and began to follow Draco, but I pulled him back. "You really think you're going to investigate without me?" I said.

"Sorry Clarisse, I think that we've gotten a bit too big to both fit under the invisibility cloak," Said Harry.

I rolled my eyes as Harry wrapped himself in the old cloak and walked out of the party. Of course I would be following them. I wanted to know what Draco was up to just as much as Harry. Harry had been speculating all year that Draco was a death eater, but I just couldn't bring myself to believe it. I had a hunch that it was true, but part of me still saw him as that little seven year old that I had known on the playground. Seven year olds can't be evil. Sixteen year olds can. Draco wasn't evil though. He had a heart. We had been friends. I missed the seven year old that I had known. Where had he gone?

I was about to go off and follow Harry, when professor Slughorn grabbed me for small talk. He was one of the kindest professors at the school, so I didn't have the heart to tell him that I had to leave his party early. The last thing I wanted to do was upset him. He was actually a very sensitive man and that kind of action would sadden him. After about five minutes of small talk, I excused myself to go use the powder room. That said that I wasn't actually leaving the party, just that I had to use the loo. That's not rude at all, I thought to myself.

I began walking up the long corridor. Where was Harry? Where was Draco? They couldn't possibly have gotten too far in only five minutes. Suddenly, I heard a soft bang come from the boys' bathroom followed by the sound of running water.

_Oh god,_ I thought. _They're dueling each other_. I didn't like Draco that much, but I didn't want him to get hurt, especially because of Harry. Harry didn't like to hurt people with magic, even if that person was one of his biggest rivals.

I ran into the large bathroom. Harry was kneeling over a lump on the floor, he looked pale and horrified. I quickly made my way next to him to find Draco Malfoy lying in a pool of his own blood. I shoved Harry away and took his place over the boy on the floor.

"Leave," I hissed at Harry. Harry made his way around the corner.

The rim of my short black dress touched the pool of water on the floor as I began to unbutton Draco's blood soaked white shirt. I knew the spell Harry had used. _Sectumsempra_. My sister studied the dark arts, she had taught me very dark spells as well as their reversals. The reversals were far more important to me. I memorized most of them by my fourth year. Thankfully, the reversal for _sectumsempra_ was fairly simple. I pulled off his shirt entirely without any resistance from Draco. He had a dark mark, I realized. In that moment I found that I truly did not care about it. All I needed to do was save the poor boy who I had once called my friend.

"_Vulnera sanentur_" I murmured as I slowly ran my wand across his pale chest. The cuts began to vanish and the blood pool began to engulf itself back into his skin.

"_Vulnera sanentur_" I murmured again. I could feel Draco silently sob on the bathroom floor. His stomach heaved as I pressed my blood soaked hand into one of the persistent cuts. His body trembled beneath my hand.

I ran my wand across his arms. "_Vulnera sanentur_" I said as the last of the blood went back into his skin. He lay on the floor trembling. He would be okay, _sectumsempra_ victims usually were just fine, just a bit shaken up. Physically, he was safe and that was all that mattered to me. I knelt on the floor next to him for a few more moments. He had defined muscles on his chest and arms and his skin looked white as parchment in the darkness of the bathroom. He had rather high cheekbones, and his slate grey eyes looked to be brimming with tears. I ran my hand across his white-blonde hair to soothe him. He flinched at my touch, but relaxed a moment later.

"You'll be alright," I said as I got up off of the floor and turned to go. I felt bad about leaving Draco on the bathroom floor, but he was perfectly fine by that point. I realized that Harry was still standing in the corner.

"Let's go," I said to Harry. "I think we all need to take some time and think about the events of tonight".

Harry didn't say a word on the way back to Gryffindor house. I was furious with him for using a spell that he didn't know. the outcome could be very bad, as it was that night in the bathroom. But I also felt a sad bad for him. He didn't mean to hurt Draco that badly. He hated Draco, I knew that, but Harry was a good person and he never wanted to see Draco like that because of his own wand. We met Ginny, Ron, and Hermione back in the common room. Harry told them what had happened. None of them looked angry, just very, very disappointed in him.

"Harry, you have to get rid of the half blood prince's book," said Ginny.

Harry slowly nodded his head in agreement. "I know"...

I wondered where Draco was now as I slowly fell asleep. The only form of communication we had was a two way journal, but there was the possibility of the journal being monitored, so we had to be incredibly vague in our notes to each other. He hadn't written in over two weeks, and I was incredibly worried about him.


	5. 4 Occlumency

After what felt like moments of sleep, I was shaken awake by Harry.

"What?!" I said, pushing him off of me. "What time is it?"

"Three am," responded Harry. So I had only been asleep for a few moments. great. "What is so important?" I noticed Hermione and Ron slowly waking up and walking over to me and Harry.

"I know where Mayla is." I sat up in bed. "I think that she's been sending me these messages, not the dark lord."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You said that Mayla was amazing with occlumency, right?"

"Well, yes, but-"

"She's been letting me into her mind," said Harry.

"That's impossible," said Hermione.

"In my vision, I _was_ Mayla. It wasn't like visions in the past.

"Harry it doesn't work like that-"

"How do you know?" asked Harry. Hermione was silent for a moment.

"You don't have a connection with Mayla like you do with the dark lord," she said.

"I think Mayla charmed me at the wedding. I've seen other visions of hers, it didn't all connect for me until now."

"Fine then, what exactly did you see," I asked.

"She was having a conversation in the basement. With Draco Malfoy."

"Lets hear it then," I said. "Her conversation."

"Mayla was lying in the dark room, when suddenly the room filled with light...

* * *

"'Well, you are most definitely not who I expected,' she said.

'Well, I didn't quite expect that I would be the one to save you,' said Draco.

'I'm guessing that my little sister sent you here to be my little savior, am I correct, Malfoy?' She asked.

Draco smiled, 'actually, I'm on house arrest. I heard them bring in another prisoner and I just had to see who it was,' said Draco 'My parents really don't want me back at Hogwarts, so I'm here.' Draco helped Mayla to her feet. 'I'm not all bad you know.'

Mayla flinched as she gained her balance. She seemed to have an issue with her knee.

'Are you okay?' Asked Draco.

Mayla tried to straighten her leg to no prevail and winced in pain. 'Give me your wand, Malfoy.' He reluctantly handed it over. Mayla murmured a spell and a horrible cracking sound emitted from her leg. Draco cringed, but sure enough, it worked.

'Thanks,' said Mayla as she handed back his wand.

"What the hell was that spell?" asked Draco.

"Nasty little thing that I taught myself after I fell off of my broom in that quidditch match fifth year. Actually, if I'm remembering this correctly, you were the one that pushed me off of my broom," Mayla smirked at him.

'Oh, you completely deserved that!' Draco retorted. 'I remember you kicking the snitch out of my direction. I was about to catch that fucking little git! And...We were on the same team Mayla!'

'We may have been on the same team, but I didn't like you very much and wanted you to feel the pain that I felt every time I saw your dumb little face,' said Mayla. 'And I'm the best damn beater that that school has ever seen! Don't you forget it… ferret boy,' Mayla grinned at him.

'Oh, fuck you, Malya! PLEASE do not remind me of that,' cried Draco.

'It couldn't have been that bad, it got you in Crabby's pants. Were you two not in love your fourth year?'

'Oh my god, Mayla! I would rather die from dementor's kiss than see Crabbe's bits, or any man's bits at that.'

'Oh, well I'm sure you wouldn't mind seeing my sister's,' Draco blushed.

Mayla turned around and saw a large wooden door behind her. 'Draco,' she said, trying to change the subject, 'There's another room down here.'

'No way, Mayla!' Said Draco sarcastically.

'Oh my god, don't be a dumbass with me. I don't take that shit. Just open the door,' retorted Mayla.

'_Alohamora,_' said Draco. The big, wooden door swung open to reveal a long corridor with cells on each side.

'It looks like a prison,' said Mayla.

'I didn't even know this was down here,' said Draco. 'I was always told that this room was for storage,' he said as he shut the wooden door behind them.

'And you never thought that maybe your parents weren't telling you the truth?' Mayla rolled her eyes. 'You know, for a Slytherin you sure are a dumbass.'

Suddenly, a quiet cough came from down the corridor.

'Who's there?' asked Draco hesitantly. Nobody responded.

'Oh come on scaredy cat,' said Mayla as she grabbed his shirt collar and yanked him down the corridor.

'You check the right cells, I'll get the left,' Mayla told him.

As she searched the cells, she came across a small, blonde figure tucked into one of the corners.

'Oh my god,' she said. Draco ran over to her cell. 'Luna Lovegood?'

The figure sprung out of the bed and came into the dim light of the wand.

'Mayla!' cried Luna. 'What are you doing here? Have they captured you too?' Asked Luna.

'Yeah, I've got a way to get us out of here though,' I said as I pulled Draco into her view.

'Draco Malfoy?' asked Luna. 'He's saving the four of us? really?'

'Yes- wait, the four of us? Are there more people in here?' asked Mayla.

'Yes,' responded Luna. 'I'm not quite sure who they are, I could only see the figures go by my cell. But I'm pretty sure that there was a man and a goblin. And you of course, but I didn't know that you were here, Mayla. Were you in one of the first cells?'

'Oh, I wasn't in a cell. I was in the main room of the basement,' responded Mayla.

'That's very interesting,' said Luna. 'Shall we save the others too, then?' Asked Luna.

'Yeah, why not.' Said Draco. 'Let's get you out of here, Lovegood. _Alohamora_.' Draco pulled open the heavy cell door.

'The other's are back here,' said Luna as she led us deeper down the corridor. 'Oh, hello Ollivander.'

The old wand maker looked up at them. He looked close to death, but that could have just been because of his extensive age.

'We're going to get you out of here,' said Mayla. Draco pointed his wand at the door. '_Alohamora_,' he said once again. The old wand maker hesitantly got up and followed them down the corridor without a word. He was much stronger than he looked.

They got to the very last cell in the corridor, to be greeted by Griphook, the Goblin.

'_Alohamora_,' said Draco, opening the last of the cells.

'Griphook,' said Mayla. 'Get up, we're saving you, you lazy fat assed goblin.'

'Little Slytherin bitch,' Griphook said under his breath.

Mayla pulled my knife out of her back pocket. The goblin put up his arms. 'Listen you ungrateful little bastard, we're saving your ass right now, so I would shut up if I were you, Because we are absolutely not obligated to get you out of here, understand?' In fact, if I was any less of a person than I am I would leave you here to rot.'

Griphook reluctantly nodded his head. Mayla tucked the knife back into her pocket.

'So how exactly are we getting out of here, Malfoy?' asked Mayla.

'Well, we can't exactly apparate inside the manor,' said Draco, 'So we'll have to climb out of the basement and jump from the window on the main story. It's not much of a jump though, It's only about two meters up. That's the easy part of our escape.'

They once again reached the big, wooden door. Draco grabbed the handle. 'Stop!' whispered Mayla as she shoved him away.

'What the hell, Mayla? do you not want to get out of here,' asked Draco.

'Shut up!' hissed Mayla. she pressed her ear against the door.

She cursed under her breath. 'What's wrong?' asked Draco.

"Voices," she whispered. 'There are people on the other side of the door.'"...

* * *

Harry ended his retelling of the story. "That's when I woke up."

"They're at Malfoy Manor then?" asked Ron.

"Yes," said Harry. "We need to go. Now."


	6. 5 The Manor

We hurriedly packed up the tent and apparated to the outside of Malfoy Manor. It was black as pitch outside in the early hours of the morning. There was a very slim chance of us being seen at this hour, but our hearts raced with the idea.

"We must disguise ourselves," whispered Hermione. "They won't call the dark lord unless they can be sure they have us."

"Polyjuice potion?" asked Ron.

"Better," said Hermione. "We only really need to disguise Harry so-" Hermione pointed her wand at Harry's face. she quickly murmured a jinx and Harry's face contorted. Harry winced in pain.

"What the hell was that?" asked Harry.

"Stinging jinx. The effects will only last about an hour so we need to be quick."

"What are the effects?" asked Harry.

Hermione grimaced. "You really don't want to know."

"Lets go!" I hissed.

We silently opened the door to the mansion and stepped inside. The foyer was almost completely dark. I saw a small light source coming from the crack under a door. I pressed my ear against the hard oak and heard hushed voices. I gripped my wand tightly against my thigh.

"Give me the invisibility cloak, Harry," I whispered. "This must be the cellar."

"Clary, you can't possibly-" I shoved my hand against his mouth.

"Shut it," I hissed. "I'll send sparks if I need help, now give me the cloak." Harry reluctantly handed over the silky fabric. I slipped it over my shoulders.

"_Alohamora_," I whispered. the lock quietly clicked and I pulled open the door. I slowly made my way down the stairs. There was a lamp on in the center, surrounded by Bellatrix Lestrange, Lucius, and Narcissa. They didn't seem to notice me. Thank god. I slipped past them to the door that Harry described. I hadn't really thought through what I was going to do now, and I didn't have much time. I peered through a hole in the door and saw the outline of figures.

Suddenly, I heard heavy footsteps coming down the stairs. The occupants of the basements turned to see Wormtail marching down the stairs. I gasped. He had Harry, Hermione and Ron in tow.

"Let me go!" cried Hermione.

" I found them at the top of the stairs," said Wormtail.

"Now!" barked a muffled voice behind the door. Suddenly, the door to the cells swung open, slamming me to the wall. I lay on the ground for a moment, my head spun with pain. The door seemed to be concealing me enough. I peered through a crack in the door. The new occupant was Draco Malfoy.

"Oh good, Draco!" said Lucius. He seemed nervous. "We have some very important guests with us." "Draco, you went to school with Potter for the past six and a half years," said Narcissa, hesitantly. "We need your help identifying these people. Can you be of help, darling?"

"Don't give him the choice! hissed Bellatrix. "Come here, Draco!"

Draoc walked over the Bellatrix. "We need some help identifying a few guests that we have here. Now, it is very important that we know for sure who these people are," said Bellatrix. She pointed over to the three 'guests'.

"I'll check it out," Said Draco as he slowly walked over to the trio. They were held down by Wormtail. "The first two are Her-" Draco stopped himself from saying their first names, "Granger and the Weasley boy."

"We have figured that out by now, Draco!" said Bellatrix in a shrill, frustrated voice. "But is the boy on the end Potter?"

"This is very important Draco, the dark lord will be upset if we give him false information," said Lucius

"It-It's hard to tell," started Draco. He paused for a moment. I held my breath."But- I just don't think it's him. Probably just another ugly mudblood,"

"What!" cried Bellatrix, "Draco, are you sure it's not him? Please!"

"It's not him, Lestrange." answered Draco. Lucius hung his head in sorrow.

Suddenly Bellatrix grabbed Hermione. "You!" she cried, "mudblood, you're coming with me! We're going to have a little chat upstairs, just us girls!" Hermione tried to struggle out of her grip.

"No please!" cried Hermione as Bellatrix dragged her upstairs. Ron tried to struggle out of Wormtail's arms to no prevail to save Hermione.

"Draco, guard our guests. Don't let them escape," hissed Lucius as he walked up the stairs. Wormtail still held Harry and Ron. The rest exited the room, just leaving me, Harry, Ron, Draco, and Wormtail.

"_Petrificus totalus_!" cried Draco. Wormtail fell to the ground with a thump. Harry and Ron struggled from his frozen grasp.

I dizzily stood up from behind the door.

"Clarisse," said Draco, walking over to me. "Are you okay?"

"Somewhat," I said. "Give me a moment. I pointed my wand at my skull and murmured the charm for fixing brain injuries. My head instantly cleared and the pain diminished. I gazed into Draco's slate grey eyes for a moment.

"Take their wands," I said, snapping out of my trance.

"Clary, is Malfoy… helping us?" Asked Ron, seemingly shocked.

"Actually I never meant to help you. But you kind of infringed on my rescue plan, so I guess you're a part of this now," responded Draco.

"Rescue plan?" I asked.

"I'll fill you in later," said Draco.

Suddenly, Mayla walked through the door that led to the prison followed by Luna, Griphook, and Ollivander. "Oh, this is _your_ rescue plan Malfoy, is it?" said Mayla with an eye roll.

We heard a scream from upstairs. "Hermione!" cried Ron as he banged on the door to the stairs.

"_Alohamora_," said Draco. the door wouldn't open. Lucius had put a strong locking charm on the door. "We have to wait for someone to come down," said Draco.

Mayla tried to stab through the door with her silver blade, but the knife reflected off of the door, not leaving a dent. "Shit!" hissed Mayla. Another scream made it's way down the stairs.

Suddenly, a slow clicking noise came through the door. The door was opening.

"Curse whoever comes through!" whispered Mayla. It was Bellatrix's husband, Rodolphus Lestrange. "_Petrificus totalus_!" cried Ron. I grabbed the man's wand as he fell to the floor.

"I'll grab Hermione, meet me outside the window on the first landing as soon as you can," said Draco.

"Why you?" asked Ron.

"Because I'm the only one of us that the people up there relatively trust," retorted Draco.

"Not for much longer," said Mayla.

Draco quickly ran up the stairs with the others behind him. He got through the door, which slammed behind him. locking us in the cellar. Another of Lucious's charms.

"Shit," I hissed. I pressed my eye against a crack in the door. My heart raced.

Bellatrix Lestrange walked around the corner with a smug smile on her face.

The room was silent for a moment, until Bellatrix spoke. "Traitor," she hissed at Draco. My heart raced. "You- you've been helping Potter!" she cried, grabbing him by the throat. he gasped for breath as Lestrange tried to push him to the floor. He struggled as hard as he could until Bellatrix jabbed her wand into his side.

"_Crucio_", she cried.

Draco opened his mouth in what would have been a scream, but her hand was still on his throat so all that came out was a shrill gasp. Draco stumbled a bit, trying to hold his balance, but the pain overtook him and he fell to the floor.

Bellatrix got onto her knees next to him, the horrible curse still inflicting pain on his thin body.

Suddenly, she lifted the curse and replaced her wand with a silver blade. Draco was in no better situation than before. I screamed from behind the door, trying to attract her to me. Nothing. Harry wrapped his hand around my mouth, trying to conceal my shrill screams. I banged against the door, tears running down my face until Mayla and Ron held down my limbs. I tried to scream again but no sound came out.

"Lay still!" Bellatrix ordered. "I swear to god I will spill your filthy blood all over this floor if you make a move to escape! Now, answer my questions truthfully or I _will_ kill you. Potter and his little army can't save you now, nor can your little mudblood friend!" I could see a person lying across the kitchen out of the corner of my eye. _Oh my god_, I thought. _Hermione._

"Have you been helping Potter?" She hissed.

"No!" cried Draco. the knife dug into his neck. I could see a trickle of blood run from the wound, staining his grey shirt.

"Tell me the truth!" She screamed.

"I am!" he cried.

"Liar!" She said. "Incarcerous!". chains wrap around Draco's body, binding him to the floor. He made an audible screamed as Bellatrix cut open his shirt sleeve to reveal his dark mark. She slit his arm and he screamed once again. My body trembled as I tried to struggle free of Mayla and Ron's grasp. I was sobbing, but no sound came out. Harry had used the muffling charm on me. I bit his hand, which was still flush against my lips. I tasted blood and Harry winced in pain.

"Please!" cried Draco, "stop!" He struggled to free himself from the chains, which just made them tighten against his body. The muffling charm was lifted and I continued to scream, this time audibly. Harry lifted his hand from my face. It was now covered in his own blood from my bite. Another slit went through Draco's arm. His blood spilled on to the floor. Draco stopped struggling. The knife went deeper into his arm. _Bellatrix was carving something over the mark_. Draco's body went limp. I forced my eyes to close. I couldn't watch him die. Suddenly, Bellatrix screamed. Hermione had woken up. The chains retreated back into the floor. Draco was still passed out. Hermione mumbled a few charms, and then began to shake him, her face tightly pinched in pain. Draco seemed to wake up.

"Granger?" He asked in a raspy voice.

"Yes, get up, Malfoy." She whispered. Her sleeve was disheveldly rolled over her arm, I noticed that it was drenched in blood like Draco's. "Take your wand." She said as she quickly threw the wand at Draco, who finally sat up. "We're going to get the others then get out of here." Hermione murmured an unlocking charm at the cellar door and it swung open.

I bolted through the open door with the others in tow. Suddenly, Lucius and Narcissa ran into the room, wands directed at us. Lucius brought Bellatrix back to an awake state. Hermione must have petrified her.

Narcissa glanced at Draco's arm. He followed her gaze. Over his dark mark, Bellatrix had carved an indecipherable word with her silver knife. His arm was drenched in blood, covering up the word. "Draco," cried Narcissa. "Please, you still have a chance to please the dark lord, Potter is here, you be the one to summon him."

I looked over at Harry, who's face had contorted back to it's normal state.

"I'm sorry mother," said Draco.

"Oh, I'm done with this shit!" hollard Mayla. She threw herself out the window, not even bothering to open it. The glass broke with her and she fell onto the bush below. "Lets go!" She screamed. The rest of us followed suit.

"take my arm," said Mayla. As soon as we were all attached we disapperated to a beach front cottage.


	7. 6 The Home By the Sea

Mayla had taken us to our childhood home. A large cottage on the Mediterranean sea. I longed to see my aging mother once again.

I stumbled a bit with the landing, but was able to gain my balance, unlike Ron; who fell flat on his face and ended up landing on Griphook.

"Get off of me you fat, ginger oaf," mumbled Griphook. Hermione pulled Ron to his feet. Griphook brushed off his dirty white shirt.

Suddenly, Draco fell to the ground. I kneeled over him. His eyes had rolled back into his head and he looked far paler than usual. His arm was drenched in blood. _Oh my god_, I thought to myself, _he's lost far too much blood_.

I cursed under my breath. The cuts on his arm were still active, and the apparation had made them far worse.

"Hermione!" cried Mayla. "you must have something in that god forsaken bag of yours to stop blood! get it now! Somebody run up to the house and get bandages, towels, and water. Tell my mother what happened. She's a muggle nurse and will be of help!"

Hermione dug through her bag as Luna and Harry sprinted up the beach to the villa. Ron stood by Hermione, trying to calm her down. She looked to be on the verge of tears. I carefully pulled Draco's torn sleeve away, revealing his pale flesh.

I pressed my ear to his chest. "His heart's still beating, but it sounds irregular," I said. Harry and Luna ran back down the beach followed by none other than Neville, Ginny, and my mother.

"Hermione," said my mother as she knelt over Draco, "give me your blood stopping liquid." Hermione finally pulled her hand out of the bag, grasping a small bottle of yellow liquid. She ran it to my mother who promptly poured the liquid over Draco's arm.

"That only stops it temporarily," said Hermione. "Enough time to wipe away the current blood and wrap his arm."

"That'll work," said my mother. "Clarisse, start to clean the blood , Mayla lead everyone except Clarisse up to the house. It is best to give the boy some space when he does wake up. Keep cleaning the blood, Clarisse. I'm going to go get some disinfectant from the villa."

I continued to dab the towel up and down Draco's arm. "You'll be okay, sweetheart, you'll be okay," I whispered to him. I stroked his head with my other hand. The cuts had not become reactive yet, so I replaced the towel with a new one and continued my job. I could see letters being revealed from under the blood.

My mother made her way back down the beach and kneeled down next to me, placing the disinfectant on the sand. "You're so good with this, darling. That's why I sent your sister back to the house. She looked a bit like she was going to vomit," said my mother. I nodded my head. Mayla had a tough exterior, but on the inside not so much. I wiped away the remainder of the blood. The word _Traitor_ was scrawled across his dark mark.

"He has a dark mark," said my mother," I nodded my head. "He's regaining some color. He'll wake up soon." She picked up the disinfectant from the sand. "Put this on his cuts." I took the small bottle from her and spread it over the letters with my index finger, careful not to reopen the cuts. "I'll go find a fresh shirt for him," said mother.

"Hermione's probably got one in her bag," I said.

"Good, I'll check with her," responded my mother.

I began to wrap the bandages around his cuts. Suddenly, he opened his eyes.

"Goodmorning," I said as I continued to wrap his arm.

"Clarisse?" He said sluggishly. He tried to sit up but I shoved him back down.

"Stay down, I don't want to have you nearly die again," I said. "You've lost a lot of blood, you know. You scared me."

"You've seen the cuts then?" Asked Draco.

"I was the one that wiped away the blood, darling," I said.

"Everybody else?" He asked.

"They saw the blood, but not the letters," I said.

"Keep it that way," said Draco.

"Of course," I said. "Let's go inside, it's getting dark out here." I helped Draco to his feet and wrapped my arm around his waist for support, he put his good arm tightly over my shoulder. I could tell that he was stumbling, but he was trying to hide it so I let him believe that I didn't notice.

I quickly led him through the house to my own attic bedroom. I sat him down on the queen bed. I always loved this room. Not only because it was mine, but because of the view. The room had no walls, just indestructible windows that my father had installed when he was alive. Looking from the outside it looked like a normal wall, like the rest of the house, but on the inside it was transparent. I had a view of the sea, miles of vineyards, and even the Swiss alps on a clear day. I looked over to the field of Azaleas that was now long dead. After my father died, so did the magic of the villa. My kingdom of Azaleas died and I stopped venturing through the field. The house could no longer clean itself, and the pictures stayed still, or the people left in the images all together.

"Where exactly are we?" Asked Draco.

It dawned on me that I had never actually told him where we were.

"Welcome to _La Villa di Fontana_," I said.

"What?" Said Draco with a laugh.

"Oh darling, I need to teach you some Italian," I winked at him. I sat down on the bed next to him.

"So this is your room then?" Asked Draco.

"It is," I responded.

"I kind of figured. Most teenagers have posters all over their walls, but not you, you're different," said Draco.

"A good different?" I asked.

"An amazing different, actually," said Draco.

I rested my head on his shoulder. I felt his arm wrap around my waist. Draco pulled me closer to him. We slowly began to lean back on the bed until we were both laying down. I rested my head on his chest. I could hear his heart beat, it seemed normal once again. I began to close my eyes, lost in him. I felt him rest his hand on my stomach.

_I love him_, I thought in that moment. I had had my fair share of boyfriends in the past. I lost my virginity to a Ravenclaw in the room of requirement in my fifth year. We had only been dating for four months. I thought that I loved him, but we broke up the week after. I realized in that moment that I hadn't loved that boy from Ravenclaw, because it felt nothing like this. I loved Draco because we could (and quite possibly would) lay on this bed for the rest of the night. Not saying a word, and not making a move. Not that I wouldn't let a move happen…

Suddenly, the door to the room swung open. I quickly pushed myself off of Draco into a sitting position, he did the same. Mayla stood in the doorway with a big grin on her face.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" She said. She was holding a blue plaid button down and a massive tray of food. I laughed.

"Looks like mom's made an Italian feast!" I said. On the wooden bed tray, there was a bowl of ravioli, a side dish full of parmesan, a giant salad, a filet of salmon, bowl of orecchiette al' Alfredo, a baked potato, a glass of wine, a glass of water, and about fourteen assorted Italian pastries.

"Oh my god," said Draco, "Is that for the entire house?"

"Haha you wish. By the end of this meal you'll have gained ten pounds and or will be vomiting into the wine glass. Trust me, I've done both before. And you two have to finish it, you know. Italian mammas get upset when you don't eat the whole meal. I doubt that you want to upset my mother," Mayla winked at Draco. I felt my cheeks get hot. "Oh don't blush, sweetie, I saw you two on the bed. You were two layers of clothes away from full on sex." Mayla plopped herself down on the bed beside me. She slung her arm over my shoulder.

"So what exactly is the plan?" I asked.

"We'll figure that all out tomorrow morning over breakfast. Everybody seems to be pretty consumed in other tasks." Mayla raised her eyebrow at Draco and I.

"What do you mean by that?" I said sarcastically.

Mayla rolled her eyes, "Well, Harry and Ginny have resided in my bedroom. No direction there. They just chose the first room that suited their 'needs'. They closed the door and lets just say the noises coming from that room aren't exactly 'sleep'. I was going to be mean and make the sounds even louder for the whole house to hear, but I silenced the room instead. We've all been through a lot today. Griphook fell asleep on the couch. Actually he might be in an alcoholic coma. If he is I swear I'm just going to toss the fat oaf into the sea. He cleaned out half of the wine cabinet. The old wandmaker is doing whatever in the guest room. Probably sleeping, possibly dying. Luna and Neville fell asleep next to each other on the porch swing. So that's adorable. And Ron and Hermione are sitting by the shore having a heated discussion about god knows what. If they start having sex holler for me. I'd love to see that little mess. You have a front row view from here Clarisse. You missed a big fun Italian meal as you two 'slept' together by the way. Me and mamma tried to teach them some Italian to no prevail. Mom's got a new muggle boyfriend apparently. So that's interesting I guess. He stopped by while we were having dinner. Had a filet of salmon and now him and mamma are taking a walk on the beach. Old people getting romantic disgusts me, so I came up here to bug you guys," Mayla took a breath.

"Done with your spiel, sweetheart?" I asked.

"I am now," said Mayla.

"Good, I've been meaning to ask you why exactly Neville and Ginny are here," I said.

"It's a safe house. They came here to escape. They're headed back to Hogwarts tomorrow," said Mayla.

"Escape from what?" asked Draco.

"The hell that is Hogwarts right now, of course," responded Mayla.

"And, is Hermione okay? Her arm was drenched in blood too." I asked Mayla.

"Yes, she's fine. Lestrange carved the word Mudblood across her arm. She healed the arm back at the manor, but the scar will always be there. So, I guess you're both branded," said Mayla. "The mudblood and the traitor."

"You saw my arm?" asked Draco.

"No, actually I took a wild guess," said Mayla. "Good to know you joined the wild band of spies." Mayla raised her sleeve to reveal her own dark mark.

"I'll be going now. Eat all of the food and then get back to your lovemaking. Maybe do them both at the same time!" Hollered Mayla as she closed the door behind her.

I turned to Draco. "You're _my_ spy," I said with a grin. A smile crept across Draco's face.

I pressed my lips against Draco's and felt his tongue penetrate my lips. He wrapped his arms around me, pulling us closer together. We fell against the cold glass, his body still against mine. I rested my palm against the back of his hand, intertwining our fingers. I lay against the bed. His body pressed to mine. I guided his hand along my torso until it was on my breast. I felt his body tremble against mine. Suddenly, he pulled away.

"I can't do this to you, Clarisse, I don't want to hurt you," said Draco.

"Oh sweetheart-" I started, I met his eyes and wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

"I've done bad things in my life, Clary. You don't want a person like me," said Draco.

I pulled my arms away, still holding his gaze.

"Darling, I know all of the bad things that you've done. I know that you are a death eater, I know that you tried to kill Dumbledore, I know that you nearly sent Harry back to King's Cross, I know that you were a massive asshole to my friends when you were younger, I know so much shit that you've done from Harry and you, and I know that you come from a family that expects you to be evil. But you're not." I stroked the back of Draco's neck, still holding his gaze. "Draco I know you better than anybody else on this planet, and surprisingly I'm still in love with you." I felt my cheeks flush.

Draco pulled me closer to him. "I'm in love with you too, Clarisse," whispered Draco. "Don't let me hurt you. Please."

"Make love to me, Draco," I said, pressing my lips against his neck.

We fumbled with each others clothes until we were down to just undergarments. I crawled under the covers and pulled off the remainder of my clothes. I felt Draco on top of me. He sunk into my body and ran his tongue up and down my neck until our lips met.

* * *

And so I lost my virginity for a second time. I don't want to count the first time with the boy from Ravenclaw. It didn't feel like this at all. I didn't feel the oneness with his body like I did tonight. I didn't love him like I love Draco.

I gazed out the window toward my field of azaleas. The magic was gone from it, but it was still a kingdom, and I finally had a prince. Nobody could ever replace my king.


	8. 7 His Story

Feeling Draco's naked body pressed against my back made me think of how we first reconnected. It all started the winter of our sixth year. Draco was under a lot of pressure then. He once told me that his task seemed simple to him in the beginning; kill Dumbledore. He thought had to do it. If he didn't then the dark lord would not only kill him, but his parents as well. He didn't want Snape to have to do it for him, even though he told me he had the option. He had signed on for the task and if he gave up he was sure that the dark lord would label him a failure, even exile him from the death eaters. He would think that Draco didn't do it because he had decided to join the Order of the Phoenix. That wasn't an option for him. At least not until I reentered him life.

* * *

The story went around the school fast. How Draco had been wandering the corridors late at night to test out the vanishing cabinet, yet had been caught by Filch, saved by Slughorn, and then nearly murdered in a bathroom by Harry. I came to him at his weakest. pushing my way past Harry into the bathroom and saving his life. I saw his dark mark that night. I left the bathroom after I was sure that he was alright, but he felt the need to thank me. He was never one to thank anybody, but I had saved his life. He said that he wanted to that night, to get it over with and then never see me again, but he didn't. And because of those two words that went unsaid, _thank you_, He would be in my life forevermore.

The morning after the events Draco told me that he got up early and went looking for me. he had been told by one of my friends in Slytherin that most mornings I went running around the grounds. Draco thought that that was a bit odd at first, but he decided to go looking for me anyway.

After wandering the grounds for about fifteen minutes, he found me sitting by the shore of the black lake. I had made a cushion of sand under my back like I always did, drinking from a black plastic water bottle. I was only wearing a sports bra and sweatpants at the time, I was expecting to remain alone. My brunette hair was pulled back in a messy bun, a skill that I had mastered over the years.

Draco walked down the tiny beach of the lake towards me.

"Hi, Fontana," said Draco.

"Oh, hey Malfoy," I said, "you're kind of the last person I was expecting. So, what brings you here?"

"I just wanted to thank you for last night," he started.

"Sit down, Malfoy," I said.

Draco hesitantly sat down on the sand next to me. "Look, without you being there last night, I probably would be dead."

"Not probably," I retorted, "You _would_ be dead if it wasn't for me, and you know it. And if you're going to thank me I recommend using my first name."

"Fine, Fon-, ummm, Clarysse" Draco said, "I _would_ be dead if it wasn't for your being there. I was wondering how you even knew I was in there, by the way."

"Oh, well what I've been telling people is that I wanted to make sure that you didn't kill Harry, but in all honesty, I was worried for you too. Aside from that I'm super nosy and wanted to know what exactly you were doing in the corridors at midnight," I said.

"Well, I can't exactly tell you that," said Draco.

"Yeah, I kind of expected that you would say that. Let me guess, top secret job from Voldemort?" I asked. Draco tensed.

"Don't say the name," he said.

"Why is that? I'm not afraid of a silly arrangement of letters. I don't serve him, I don't worship him, and I certainly do not fear him," I said. "But, you're a death eater, and that's probably not so true for you," I turned to him expectantly.

"So you saw the mark?" he asked.

"Of course I did, I tore off your shirt. I saw everything above the waist," I said. "Well, with that I should be going." Draco got to his feet as well as I began to walked away. Suddenly I spun around, once again we were face to face. "Look, Draco. In all seriousness, if you ever want to talk, please, don't hesitate. I'm not one to go spilling your little death eater-y secrets- my father was a death eater, you know that he was." I pulled on my grey jacket. "Anyways, come find me sometime. I'm here to talk." Draco nodded his head.

* * *

At that point, I never thought that I would speak to Draco again, but sure enough in the next few weeks, even months, we saw each other a lot. Always in the same place, in the morning. We never saw each other during the day, we thought that that would be socially dangerous. Aside from the passing glance in the hallway once in a while, we acted like strangers. But before long I knew more about him than any other person in the world. He didn't tell me everything, he still felt that he had to kill Dumbledore. I knew that Draco was up to something, but I never pried information out of him. I let him get to it by himself. He said that he loved that about me.I knew that he was falling in love with me with each encounter. It wasn't until one night, close to the end of school, that he told me everything. Surprisingly, nothing really changed between us.

* * *

_It was the night that he had planned to kill Dumbledore_. The vanishing cabinet had been fixed, and death eaters were set to enter the castle later on. They wanted to be there when it happened. Draco said that he didn't want to go through with it, but he didn't see another choice.

I sensed that something was wrong with him that morning. That was the first time that I actually tried to pry the information out of him, but he just pushed me farther away. He told me that he had once thought about suicide, but didn't want to upset me.

The conditions that night were perfect for him. Harry and Dumbledore arrived at the astronomy tower. He said that he had planned to do it in Dumbledore's office, but the tower worked too. It would be easy, it would be quick. As soon as Harry went under the tower, Draco quickly made his way up the stairs. Dumbledore stood there alone, unprotected. Draco stood on the platform and pointed his wand at Dumbledore, his hand trembling.

"Draco, don't do this," said the old man.

Draco's hand shook. a lump was forming in his throat. Draco felt horrible, he confided to me later.

"_Expelliarmus_," cried Draco. Dumbledore's wand flew out of his hand.

"I knew a boy that was just like you, many years ago," said Dumbledore. "He made all of the wrong choices. Don't be like him. You are not an assassin."

"But I have to," Draco said. His voice shook. tears ran down his face."They're going to kill me." At this point I had found Harry under the platform and stood with him. I couldn't bear to see Draco go through with this, it would kill him. I sent sparks through the floorboards as a warning sign. Draco looked down through the cracks and locked eyes with me, the eyes that he had slowly been falling in love with. He said that he was terrified for me, the death eaters would arrive soon. Harry pulled me into a corner under the cloak just in time for the arrival of the death eaters.

Bellatrix was the first up the stairs. Draco's parents and Greyback followed her. Bellatrix had a twisted smile on her face. Draco looked back through the floorboards, locking eyes with me once again. Harry and I stood under their feet, prepared to attack.

"What are you waiting for?" Hissed Bellatrix. "Do it Draco!"

"Yes, sweetheart, now," said Narcissa. She placed her hands on Draco's shoulders.

Suddenly, Snape walked up the tower. Dumbledore turned to him. "Severus, please," said the old man.

Snape pointed his wand at Dumbledore, "_Avadakadavra!" cried Snape._ Dumbledore fell over the railing like a rag doll. I slapped my hand against Harry's mouth as he screamed. I wrapped us in the invisibility cloak as Bellatrix skipped downstairs followed by Snape, the Malfoys and Greyback. Draco stood on the platform for a few moments behind them. Draco looked around the platform but saw nobody. I pulled the cloak off of my body, revealing myself and Harry.

I walked over to Draco, tears running down my face. "Don't follow them Draco. Please, stay."

"I'm so sorry," said Draco, his voice shaking. He sounded close to tears. We locked eyes for a moment until Draco turned away and walked down the tower, following the others.

* * *

The next morning Draco found me perched in my usual spot in the sand. he sat down next to me. I tried to ignore him. I was hurt by what he had done. He chose the death eaters over me. I felt a lump rising in my throat, but I tried to hide it.

"Clarisse," he said. "Please, don't hate me. I'll do anything for you not to hate me. You're the only person in my life that I can trust, that I can really talk to."

"I don't hate you Draco," I said. We were silent for a moment.

"I didn't want to hurt you, Clarisse. I'm so sorry that I did. I can never take what I did back. I regret it to the bottom of my heart. I'll do anything for you, Clarisse. I- I could be a spy for the order. I don't expect you to tell me anything about the Order, I know you can't trust me, I understand that. I don't need your trust. I just want our relationship to be normal again," he said.

"Draco, after last night it's going to take a while for us to ever be 'normal' again. I'm not sure if we ever will be," I said.

"You're the reason that I didn't kill him Clarisse. I saw your eyes through the crack. I don't know how you ended up there, but I have a future because of you. You wordlessly reminded me that I can't be a murderer. I can't be a death eater. I don't want to be _bad_, Clarisse. Not anymore," he said.

"Draco, you were never _bad_," I responded. "Just lost." We sat in silence for a moment. I looked into his slate grey eyes. "I'm going to take you up on your offer by the way. To be a spy for us. Nobody must know but me."

"Of course, Clarisse," I said.


	9. 8 Morning

I woke up to a changing sky. The room began to illuminate with the beautiful colors of sunrise, which reflected onto the dark sea below. It had been a while since I woke up in my own room. I had spent the summer prior at the burrow, preparing for Bill and Fleur's wedding. Another factor of that was not drawing attention to my mother, who was still considered a friend of the death eaters after my father's death. They would never consider her home to be a safe house and I wanted to keep it that way.

My mind flashed back to the events of the previous night. Escaping the manor, yes; but mainly making love to Draco. I felt his arms still wrapped around my stomach. I carefully moved his hands off of my naked body, trying not to wake him. I slowly made my way out of the bed, feeling the chilly air on my bare skin. I grabbed a short green dress out of the wardrobe and pulled it over my head. It felt good to be in clothes that hadn't been traveling in a bag for the past few months.

I looked back over at Draco, who was still sound asleep. I pulled on a pair of black flats and made my way down the narrow staircase from my attic bedroom. Nobody seemed to be awake yet. I stepped outside onto the terrace. The air was brisk, but it still had a warm tint that remained in Tuscany year round. I leaned over the rail, gazing at the sea below me. There had always been a part of me that wondered what would happen if I just plunged into the water and never returned to land. Would I become a mermaid like my wildest fantasies seemed to justify? or would I sink to the bottom, letting the salt water fill my body; letting myself simultaneously die and gain immortality. That state between living and dying always terrified me. Where your soul is still on earth after your body had failed you. Where you want to die, but dream of being vivacious once again. I rested my palm on the railing, watching the ripples of water splash the shore. I was alive in this beautiful, sickening now.

I looked back to the pink sky, the vivid navy that had lingered for a while had now vanished, making way for the light of daytime. I peered back through the glass door to the kitchen, nobody looked to be there yet. I decided to walk down to the water's edge. I had always had an admiration for the Mediterranean. It offered a vast amount of history, beauty, and mystery; more than any other place on earth. It mesmerized me that the water that lay at my doorstep was the same water that aphrodite was fashioned from; the same water that saw the trojan war; the same water that fostered trade between Africa and Europe; the same water that humans had seen as fantastical for years.

I pulled off the black flats and let the icy water run over my bare feet. I took another step into the sea. The waves splashed against my ankles. I took a few more steps, feeling the water make it's way up the rim of my green dress. It felt amazing. I walked further into the sea, which now was at my waist. The bottom of my dress floated to the surface, revealing my bare legs to whatever swam below me. I bent down in the cold water, engulfing my entire body. I opened my eyes, which burned with the exposure to the salt. I looked around my feet, taking in the beauty of the sea that I had never been able to experience before. My lungs tightened with lack of air, so I pulled my head out of the water, completely soaked. I breathed in the fresh, sea air and then made my way back to the shore line.

I let my feet linger in the water for a few more seconds. Funny that the sea had been at my doorstep since I was young, but I had never felt it as fully as I did now. The cold water surrounded my tanned ankles, making me sink into the rich shoreline. I felt arms wrap around my waist. "Clarisse, we need to go, now," said Draco.


End file.
